But I'm not an unfair or cruel man - especially not to my friends. So, in an effort to remedy this perceived smear campaign against one of Laramie's finest, I give you a list of Tom's recent accomplishments:
- Acquired no less than three novel and derogatory nicknames in a single weekend up in Lander, including "Dr. Felchman", "Pantene" (an updated version of the previous "Silky") and "a wig riding a chicken".
- Through diligent work at the gym, swelled his already over-sized biceps to such a diameter that the last nickname actually seems appropriate:
- Yarded on gear up numerous finger cracks, while exclaiming "I had it that time!"
- Had a local bar proclaim Wednesdays "Tommy Night". Unfortunately, only patron on Wednesdays is the aforementioned Tommy.
- Had a novel drink named after him at the above bar. Again unfortunately, the name was in fact "Buttercup".
- Fell off a route at Beehive Buttress - likely the first time any climber accomplished this almost Herculean feat.
- Frequently took intellectual high ground by referring to his level of education - his "pH level intellect", to be precise.
Of course this is only a minute sample of all his neigh-well-heroic deeds - the most impressive of which might be putting up with all the shit he gets from his friends...
In other news, I've got family coming in this week and I'm excited about that. Hopefully we'll enjoy some rodeo, mountains and good steaks. If you want to come visit at some point, just shoot me an e-mail!
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